So I’ve been nonstop busy for the better part of a year. A day off here and there. Late nights, early mornings, overnights, undernights, timetables shifting and changing last minute. Leaving at midnight arriving somewhere else at 630 in the morning. Traveling through two to three boroughs to get to work. Ignoring the work that I want to do. Finding a way to blame that on my schedule. Which is convenient.
To be honest, I’ve been doing more work in the past few years than I had in the three directly following art school. When I was toiling away in the basement of a bar. It was only three nights a week, but my camera stayed at home every day. My sketch book unmolested gathering dusk instead of graphite. I was more interested in drinking my way through my work week. I got nothing done.
I’ve stopped lugging ice and slinging drinks for a living. Now I’m shooting almost every day and pointing lights for a pay check. It’s considerably more rewarding, even if there are fewer stories to tell. I’m much happier doing this than I’ve been doing anything else. And yet…
There’s still something missing. This blog has been helping, but sometimes I’m simply spinning wheels in the mud. The days where I realize I haven’t taken anything and just snap a shot for the sake of snapping a shot. A crazy amount of my photos here are simply taken in passing. With little to no planing or thought. Which is okay… but I want to do something bigger. Something that’s always on my mind, but I’m having difficulty making it manifest.
I find myself blaming my schedule. My Space. My Equipment. My Lack of Resources. Time and Money. And while these are obstacles. I know that I’m the biggest thing standing in the way of the completion of my projects. The first step is realizing that you have a problem. Now its time to do something about it.